Speak Like the Devil
by Saleh Onasi
Summary: She just wouldn't shut up... MatthewxSerra, Oneshot.


I felt like doing something on the MatthewxSerra pairing. I was on a major sugar high at 2 AM when I came up with the idea, so... Not sure how good it is. Oh well.

Disclaimer: I don't own Fire Emblem.

--

"You know… I've been wondering about this for a while…But…Are you really sure you're Elimine's clerics? Are you sure you're not actually the follower of some dark, evil god?"

"That was very, very mean, Matthew! Are you trying to hurt my tender feelings?"

Matthew winced. He ought to stop provoking her. It made her speak, and that in turn made birds fall dead out of trees.

Serra stalked in front of him and stood there, arms crossed, barring his way with a pout.

He sighed. "Hmmm…Tender… right. Let's get going." _Please shut up now._

"You see! You realize I'm right. Luckily, being a devout cleric, I can forgive you for your indiscretion against my holy being. In fact, I think you should praise me for my works. Pray, vassal! Oh, wait, we're moving, just follow me and sing hymns of my beauty and grace! Better yet…" She strode forward forcefully, her pink pigtails bouncing behind her.

Matthew's knife hand twitched.

--

Serra bounced along next to Matthew and his hiding place. He inwardly groaned. Or thought he did.

"Matthew! You act as though it is anything but a blessing to be near me! Why, I-"

"Shut up! You'll give away my position!"

"No, I won't," she shot back shrilly, "In fact, they've already spotted you! Here comes a General! Now be a good vassal and defend your beauteous saint to the end! Matthew? He's that way! Matthew!!"

The thief, running helter-skelter from the threat, skidded to a halt. "Come on, keep up!"

"You know I can't run! It's bad for my image! I might EEEEEEEEEK!!" Serra shrieked as the armored lanceman thrust his spear forward. The man visibly flinched behind his visor, and the strike went wide.

Serra dropped to the floor and screamed again. "OMIGOSH I DON'T WANNA DIIIIEEEEEE!!"

The general, seeking to end his torment, raised his lance above his head for to finish the shrieking cleric. Before it could descend, however, a red blur whipped across the vulnerable back of the armored behemoth, and he stopped, took one more step forward, then collapsed.

"I DON"T WANNA DIE I DON'T WANNA DIE I DON'T WANNA-"

"Serra, SHUT UP!! He's dead!"

Serra glanced up to find Matthew standing over the general's corpse, looking cross, and sliding an armorslayer back beneath his cloak.

"Oh. Well, good boy Matthew! I knew you couldn't leave me behind- Hey! Come back!"

"He wouldn't have attacked if you hadn't attracted him, Serra." Matthew glared back at the once again cheerful cleric.

"Attracted- Well, it's not MY fault Elimine saw fit to bless me with my alluring charms!"

"…"

--

"But I want my own vassals!"

Matthew suppressed a sob. She just wouldn't shut up! It was as if Serra was determined to drive him over the edge due to some sadistic whim. He sighed. "…Oh please, not again. And what exactly would you have your vassals do?"

He tried to tune her out, to no avail. Her voice could pierce the armor of any general, and it was incessant as the rain falling on them.

The agony in his ears stopped for a moment. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw her looking expectantly at him. "…Oh, is that all? Well then..."

She wasn't done, it seemed. "I wonder if someone has misplaced their vassals recently? Maybe there's just one lying around here somewhere…"

Matthew gritted his teeth against the pain in his eardrums. "Not…bloody…likely."

They trudged onwards, moving towards the northern villa whilst the main forces began forcing their way towards Erik and his cavalry. Suddenly, Serra stopped and peered at something through the downpour.

"OMIGOSH IT'S ERK!!" There was a pink and white blur, and Serra was rushing towards a silhouette engaging a cavalier. Matthew smiled. Poor Erk.

Still, it was kind of dull with Serra gone…

--

"She's not bad looking… if only she would just…shut…up…"

"Matthew!" A cry pierced the air.

"Yeah, yeah. Come along, I know… save…me…" He trudged in the newly promoted bishop's wake. She bounced along, full of energy as always, completely oblivious to his pleas.

"You know what Matthew?" He swore quietly.

She stopped and turned around. "I heard that! I'm a follower of Elimine! You should be more respectful of my delicate mind!"

Matthew stared at her as she lectured him. She never missed a beat.

Just like Leila.

He blinked and looked at Serra for a moment. She was nothing like Leila, but for two things. One was her inbuilt tempo, the continuous, fast paced beat of her life.

The other, Matthew realized, with a degree of astonishment- tinged ever so slightly with horror- was the way she captured his thoughts.

Matthew shook his head. Leila's death hung over him, that was true. And yet, he realized he had stayed near Serra because of how she seemed to stave of all forms of grief. Her happy nature and never-ceasing banter kept him from the depths of depressions, and had grown on him.

Matthew swore again.

Serra halted her rant and puffed herself up. "Well, I never! Your nerve to interrupt me, and in such a vulgar manner too-"

Matthew couldn't take it. The noise once again tore at his ears. And now, even in his thoughts she was there, cutting off his only escape route, forcing him to confront her.

So he kissed her.

Serra's eyes opened in shock as Matthew mashed his lips into hers, looping his arm around her, keeping her from escaping, not that it was necessary. She was too stunned by his sudden advance to do anything but kiss him back. Matthew broke off the kiss and stepped back, smirking. Serra's mouth opened and closed, but nothing emerged. Matthew's grin broadened. He liked her better when she was speechless.

Serra blinked, and her voice seemed to return. "MATTHEW!! I… you… I can't believe that…"

Matthew grimaced. She was back to herself.

So he kissed her again.

This was going to be a high-maintenance relationship.

--

Well...

Could have been worse. Then again, I can never get a good fix on my own writing, which is why reviews are appreciated.

-SalehOnasi


End file.
